Wall of Dale

Last week Dale had another cancer check up that was successful. Blood levels are fine, platelets a bit low, but okay. It is always nice to verify hopes of continued remission. On a day to day note, his discomforts may stem from other health issues or effects of chemotherapy, (we don't know) however, he continues to find joy in life.

He had his formal retirement from his civilian government position a few days before the cancer check up appointment. Although it happened to be on the same day the government closed down, about 100 people showed up to the retirement ceremony. As we entered the base, he was saluted, bringing a smile to me, and wonderment to his grandchildren as they followed us inside the entrance gates. It was a great experience and he was honored well. We now have a "Wall of Dale" displaying his recognitions in military and civilian service. Pretty astonishing. The commander gave a special salute to him, impressing the grandchildren in attendance.

Two years ago, we did not know if he would make it this far. He did, thanks to all who helped us both. We appreciate everyone in attendance and their continued friendships. I looked at the audience, and thought to myself, "These are the community members that have sustained MyDale for many years. Oh dear....now it is up to me!"

All is well!

After the tests yesterday and today, the cancer doctor says Dale is all clear and doing well! Three months and another check-up, and then that is about it. His check-ups get further and further apart and at the two year mark, one more immunization shot and he is done with those. We congratulated the doctor on her great work and said thank you!

Now, his other ailments are forefront and will be addressed with primary care doctor. Primary care doctor versus cancer doctor--big difference. Life is good, and moving onward.

Life is good, and moving onward. 

Retired

No more 3 AM mornings. No more van pools. No more of it all. We drove to a small town three hours away for a school thing I needed to do on Dale's first day of retirement. As we sat at the lunch table, Dale quietly looked around, and said, "so this is what retirement is like?" Yup. Simple pleasures.

Much healing should come with good night's rests and work stresses gone. 

Blacking out and stumbling

In a couple of weeks, Dale will have his six month check-up with all the tests, lungs, blood works, PET Scan, perhaps bone biopsy, heart, and anything else they think he may need. He seems weaker daily and reports he that feels like he is smothering and has painful legs and feet. My main concern comes from another incident.

As we walked home from church yesterday, (about a block away) Dale stumbled and blacked out or blacked out and stumbled. I do not know which came first. He rolled down onto the grass, however, he was out for a few seconds. Although the color did not leave his face and he recouped quickly, it is never a good thing when one passes out. I was able to help him get up off the ground and home, but he felt light headed the rest of the day and slept several hours after the incident. He remained home Monday, making it without incident but he slept many hours of the day.

Dale's weakened state concerns me and panics him. If more happens before next doctor's tests, I will write again, but I anticipate more of the same, just a bit worse, and suspicious test results.

We can do this

Another wife of a mantle cell lymphoma patient contacted me through the blog this past weekend.  There are many people searching for hope, understanding, and support from others in similar circumstances. Each has a different journey through the cancer, but all hold on to hope. The research has come a long ways, with each patient contributing to the next patient's treatment regime. Research is possible and necessary.

Dale continues to do more than he can/should every day. His sense of urgency increases daily. We are making progress on his Bucket List, to which I am grateful, as is he. We enjoy time together and have made forward decisions that are working well for our unknown future. Simplify, de-clutter, prepare, and enjoy what we have.

Health continues to be so-so. Shortness of breath, fatigue, diarrhea two-three times a week, and pain in feet and legs.  His six month check up will be in a few weeks with all the cancer tests. He is a bit anxious about the results and frequently reports he "feels like I did before I knew I had cancer." I will report when I have results. In the mean time, people looking for mantle cell answers and hope, know you are not alone. We can do this.

Leg cramps

Dale is always tired. He has frequent leg cramps, difficulty breathing, and trouble with the constant pain in his bones. Today he has a fever, has chilled, and slept most of the day. Yesterday he had another round of the immunization shots which we believe, may be the cause of the fever.  What do we know?

He is so fragile! I don't understand the pain in his bones. Is it due to lack of oxygen? Is it because his transplant doing weird things? Dale's health is such a mess. His emotions are tuned to certain things that I call his bucket list. His feelings of urgency to accomplish these things increases with each day of pain. In other words, he feels his days are numbered. Of course, I have no idea of that number, but appreciate the decisions we are making before WE can't make them any more.

Small steps forward

I receive an occasional email from blog followers out there in cyber-land. Unfortunately, mantle cell lymphoma is active in these people's lives. I am sorry, yet it also brings a certain level of hope. We are not alone in this journey of cancer. The past almost two years is full of lessons learned, people appreciated, and a roller coaster of emotions.

I am typically asked what medications he was on, treatment protocol, and bone marrow type. I apologize for not reporting medical names of Dale's treatment. It does not really matter to me what the medical terms are, just that it has worked so far. No doctor asked us to consult with them in medical jargon, or gave Dale an opportunity to suggest another chemotherapy schedule. He received treatment, I report, repeat. I feel as the caretaker, my focus is on the care of patient, only. His bone marrow transplant, by the way, came from his own stem cells, harvested at an optimal time is his treatment, frozen, and then given back to him for the transplant.

Health report since last couple of posts is reasonably fine. University lab work showed nothing scary. No treatments other than extended seven days of antibiotics. That ended two days ago and he seems okay. That does not mean he is well, just no fevers. I am a bit anxious about a lingering infection that may manifest itself again. He goes to work each day, comes home and crashes, exhausted. He feels light-headed, fatigued, and reports muscle aches and cramping. His chest hurts and he reports that he feels he is suffocating.

Although he is stubborn enough to carry on with his agenda, he does not feel like doing much. We went to a movie this afternoon and enjoyed it. He wants me to feel as though some things are a little normal. Seeing through my Polly Anna eyes, we are okay. Small steps are taken for the next stages in our lives, however, they are steps forward.