Retired

No more 3 AM mornings. No more van pools. No more of it all. We drove to a small town three hours away for a school thing I needed to do on Dale's first day of retirement. As we sat at the lunch table, Dale quietly looked around, and said, "so this is what retirement is like?" Yup. Simple pleasures.

Much healing should come with good night's rests and work stresses gone. 

Blacking out and stumbling

In a couple of weeks, Dale will have his six month check-up with all the tests, lungs, blood works, PET Scan, perhaps bone biopsy, heart, and anything else they think he may need. He seems weaker daily and reports he that feels like he is smothering and has painful legs and feet. My main concern comes from another incident.

As we walked home from church yesterday, (about a block away) Dale stumbled and blacked out or blacked out and stumbled. I do not know which came first. He rolled down onto the grass, however, he was out for a few seconds. Although the color did not leave his face and he recouped quickly, it is never a good thing when one passes out. I was able to help him get up off the ground and home, but he felt light headed the rest of the day and slept several hours after the incident. He remained home Monday, making it without incident but he slept many hours of the day.

Dale's weakened state concerns me and panics him. If more happens before next doctor's tests, I will write again, but I anticipate more of the same, just a bit worse, and suspicious test results.

We can do this

Another wife of a mantle cell lymphoma patient contacted me through the blog this past weekend.  There are many people searching for hope, understanding, and support from others in similar circumstances. Each has a different journey through the cancer, but all hold on to hope. The research has come a long ways, with each patient contributing to the next patient's treatment regime. Research is possible and necessary.

Dale continues to do more than he can/should every day. His sense of urgency increases daily. We are making progress on his Bucket List, to which I am grateful, as is he. We enjoy time together and have made forward decisions that are working well for our unknown future. Simplify, de-clutter, prepare, and enjoy what we have.

Health continues to be so-so. Shortness of breath, fatigue, diarrhea two-three times a week, and pain in feet and legs.  His six month check up will be in a few weeks with all the cancer tests. He is a bit anxious about the results and frequently reports he "feels like I did before I knew I had cancer." I will report when I have results. In the mean time, people looking for mantle cell answers and hope, know you are not alone. We can do this.